When is a story a story?

When a Telugu filmstar turns 52, as CNN IBN feels?
Is it ever a story when someone turns 52?
In case the channel runs out of stories, here’s some help.
Bill Gates turns 52 this year as well. As does Indra Nooyi.
As do a few million other people.
And if you’re really in a fix, try people who turn 53. Or 51.

Or, for chrissakes, just pick a number!

Good news is no news

That’s all one can infer from two unrelated incidents of the past month.

Piyush Pandey completed 25 years at O&M. None of the MSM products saw fit to write about it.
Yashpal Khanna completed 15 years at STAR TV. None of the MSM products saw fit to write about it.

Let a mid level manager resign from O&M or STAR TV and it will be breaking news in the media focused dotcoms and will form part of a larger story in the advertising and media pages of newspapers.

Attrition is a story, retention or loyalty is not.

Peter Mukerjea to get out of recruitment business?

Towards the end of last year, newspapers in Mumbai reported rumours on Peter Mukerjea’s imminent departure from STAR TV. In the absence of any official comment, at that time, from STAR or Mukerjea, rumours and gossip were published as fact and as news.
And one would think that those who were so keen to know what Mukerjea was up to eight months ago would still be as keen – but they’re obviously not.
Peter Mukerjea’s non-compete with STAR ended yesterday, and, today, he’s free as a bird to get out of the recruitment business of INX and into the media business at INX Media.

And not a single newspaper reported the milestone.

Of Harry Potter and Scotch whiskey

We’ve all heard of how more Scotch is sold in India than is bottled in Scotland.
Now, if this report on ibnlive is to be believed, more than a few million copies of the latest Harry Potter have been sold in India.

“In India, pre-release orders have run into several millions and bookstalls will open by 0600 hours on Saturday so that everybody can have access to the book on the same day. Separate stalls have been set up for those who have booked their copies in advance. Over one million copies have already been sold online.”

So says ibnlive.
The problem is, according to friends in the publishing industry, less than 2,50,000 copies of the book have been imported into India.

Buy the new Harry Potter! Get fame, free!

Today’s consumerised society presents any number of get-famous-quick ops.
And the next one is imminent.
Be the first one to stand in a queue (it won’t be a queue yet) for the new Harry Potter. My advice: start tomorrow morning (Monday).
I guarantee you that the major news channels, the major newspapers and the major dotcoms will interview you immediately. Perhaps the international wire services will as well, and you could feature in a story in England or in America as part of a larger Harry Potter story – to prove that the Potter phenomenon works even in countries like India.
Yesterday, a news channel covered a Lagaan promotion at Landmark bookshop LIVE for over an hour! That’s potty.
And now they’ll go Potter.

Schizophrenia at ibnlive

This is getting ridiculous.
Three senior staffers at CNN-IBN blog on Rajnikant and Sivaji on ibnlive. First off, it was Anuradha Sengupta, who called the film crap – and Rajni fans came down on her like a tonne of bricks.
Next it was the sports correspondent, Sanjeeb Mukherjee, with a poorly written piece that borders on the irresponsible and the inflammatory by making the whole Sivaji phenomenon an Aryan-Dravidian polarisation. The post drips with thinly veiled sarcasm and a childish attempt at transliterating the Tamilian’s English accent, and ibnlive visitors came down on him like another tonne of bricks.
Finally, it’s Jhoomur Bose, Features Editor, who writes a blog in praise of the superstar. To prove her sincerity, she takes a cheap dig at the Big B, and underlines that she believes Rajni is a national, and not just a south Indian, superstar.

And none of the three bloggers knows Tamil. One claims openly that she knows but a few words. Despite reading Jhoomur’s post twice, I can’t be sure that she has even seen the movie.
This is madness.

Is there a method to the madness, Rajdeep?

QOTD: Can polls get stupider than this?

CNN-IBN is conducting a poll (here we go again, back to my pet peeve), that will identify India’s sports icon.
And I wanted to vote for Vijay Amritraj, but he wasn’t on the list of nominees. Neither was his brother Anand.
And I wanted to vote for Sania Mirza, but she wasn’t on the list of nominees.
No sign of Wilson Jones or Michael Fereira, though Geet Sethi is there.
Three cricketers are nominated, but not Bedi, Prasanna, Venkat or Chandra.
No Ramesh Krishnan, nor his father.

And get this one: Not a single hockey player. Zilch.

And the poll is completely ridiculous at the moment of writing (click here to see current status), with Sachin Tendulkar a runaway leader, with 84% of the votes cast. Currently Gavaskar brings up the rear, with a mind-boggling 0.29% (yes, that’s zero point two nine per cent) of ibnlive’s visitors opting for him.

Here’s my Question of the Day: Can polls get stupider than this?

A foretaste of times to come

A month or so from now, NDTV's Lifestyle channel will be available to all of us. And another few special interest channels from the same stable.
So will a number of niche channels from TV18, and from Peter Mukerjea's INX Media (oops, that should read Indrani Mukerjea).
So will a zillion lifestyle programmes on various channels.

So will a zillion niche and special interest magazines.
And in this wonderful age of consumerism, Indians will consume almost anything, which is good for the economy and good for special interest media products.

And one of my favourite media products, The Onion, gives you an idea of times to come.

New Pompous Asshole Magazine To Compete With Cigar Aficionado

NEW YORK-Upscale consumers who enjoy cigars, wine, and "all the finer things in life" will have a new magazine to enjoy beginning next month when Pompous Asshole hits the stands.

Go on, get out of here and click on the Onion link!

Of sobriety and text messages and the real wonder of the world

You cannot make a man sober by act of Parliament, goes the old adage.
Governments, over the decades, have failed to accept this simple truth.

And you cannot make a wonder of the world by totting up text messages.
You cannot make Shilpa Shetty a great actor by totting up text messages.
You cannot make Sanjaya a great singer by totting up text messages.

Consumers, over the next few decades, will fail to learn these simple truths.

And media houses and telecom companies, over the next few decades, will make fortunes because, as Barnum might have said a few decades ago, a sucker is born every minute.

And that, my friends, is a wonder of the world.

What we must do to save the game: cricket

With thanks and apologies to Adrian Proszenko, who wrote this piece, and LeagueHq.com, where I copy-pasted this from.

Read the piece below. Replace all ARL with BCCI. Replace News Ltd with BCCI. All emphases in the article mine.

BULLDOGS legend Steve Mortimer has called for News Ltd and the ARL to hand over control of rugby league to an independent commission to ensure the future of the code.

Mortimer described the NRL as a "dysfunctional" ruling body hamstrung by the self-interest and political agendas of its co-partners that wasn't serving the best interests of the game.
The former NSW and Australian halfback has outlined his rescue plan for rugby league to The Sun-Herald, which revolves around the establishment of a nine-person board to head up the independent commission. He said the game was in disarray and the new body's top priority would be to solve the current problems, including:
- Putting an end to the spate of mid-season player movements

- Slowing the exodus of players to Super League

- Preventing the AFL from making further inroads at grassroots level

- Saving the game from dying in country areas

- Making rugby league a truly national game.

Mortimer has been disillusioned with the NRL's lack of leadership and the general direction of the game for many years. But the final straw was the disruption and fan outrage over mid-season player movements and signing announcements, which reached its lowest point during Craig Wing's very public decision to join South Sydney from next year.

"I fear for our code," Mortimer said. "The game will never die, but it will never thrive until we put the game's agenda before our own.
"We're coming up to 100 years of celebration of rugby league [in 2008] and I believe the greatest gift the game can give itself in its centenary is the establishment of an independent commission.
"The ARL must relieve itself of duty, while News Ltd is either bought out of the game or asked to step away.
"The only agenda for the commission would be to grow the game, while right now everyone has their own agenda. I don't believe a publishing company should run the game, while the ARL hasn't moved with the times and have a lot of people in it for themselves.
"I love the game and that's why I'm speaking out now."

Mortimer said News Ltd had brought much-needed commercial expertise and business acumen to the game following the Super League war. However, he said it was inappropriate for a media company to run the game and said that long-term broadcast rights could be offered as an incentive to relinquish control.

Why I’m not saving the Taj Mahal

The Taj Mahal’s pride of place as one of the wonders of the world is under threat because of people like me. I haven’t voted for it to be included in the new, improved, list of wonders. Millions of Indians need to vote to keep the Taj hanging in there, and now people are getting upset with my irresponsibility.

On CNN IBN, India’s Joint Secretary , Ministry of Tourism and Culture, Leena Nandan exhorts me to vote: "There is time, so vote for the Taj and your vote is going to be the deciding factor. So each of us needs to think that way and that will really bring a momentum to the efforts of so many people."
Continues the CNN IBN report: “Among the few celebrities who have pitched in is AR Rahman, who has composed a song for the India Unites campaign to vote for the Taj Mahal, but that's not enough.”
Says lawyer and conservationist MC Mehta, "The apathy on the part of the Government of India and the state government is visible when you see that the Agra city itself is stinking today."

All I have to do is to SMS “TAJ” to a short code number. But I won’t.

Because the fine print in the ads in something like 4pt size tells me that premium rates apply.
And we have India’s Joint Secretary urging you to send a premium priced message, you have AR Rahman doing so, and you have a conservationist doing so. All making you feel guilty as sin that you haven’t done your little bit.
When you mugs out there have voted to save the Taj, do ponder on this for a moment: who’s raking in the moolah?
The larger worry is the Government supporting what, surely, is private enterprise.

Bangladesh too breaks record: 1,2,3 and 4 score centuries

Not to be outdone by India's batsmen becoming the first 1-2-3-4 to score centuries in Test cricket, Bangladesh's 1-2-3-4 bowlers have now conceded over 100 runs each. Dravid was kind enough to wait till Mohd. Sharif conceded 100 runs before he declared.

This test match is a great advertisement for cricket.

Not.

But I have nothing to do on a Saturday afternoon.

TV Polls stink, that's my opinion

Study: 38 Percent Of People Not Actually Entitled To Their Opinion

CHICAGO—In a surprising refutation of the conventional wisdom on opinion entitlement, a study conducted by the University of Chicago's...

And when one thinks of all the polls done by all the news channels, newspapers, magazines and websites to arrive at amazing "opinions", I start believing that decision makers in media would greatly benefit from reading this article from the Onion.

That's my opinion. And after reading the Onion piece, I have no clue whether I am actually entitled to one.

Go on, click the link.

Cricket loses commentator to coke

Sad. With Maninder Singh busted for possession of cocaine, TV has lost a good commentator and a student of the game.
Because media has to be cruel, and will definitely put Maninder the media expert into cold storage.

Asia goes Liverpool crazy tonight

If you thought it unfair that we in India have to wait till past midnight for the Champions League final kickoff, spare a thought for Liverpool fans in Singapore, Djakarta, Hong Kong and Tokyo.

Soccer is exploding as a spectator sport in India, and I wait in anticipation of the ratings on Ten Sports for tonight's game. It will do better in SEC AB males than a number of the Cricket World Cup Super Eight matches, is my guess.

And for those who are interested, here are some interesting odds, courtesy Ladbrokes.

To win the game:
Milan 4/6
Liverpool 5/4


First goal scorer:
Kaka 5/1
Dirk Kuyt 8/1
Filippo Inzaghi 8/1
Alberto Gilardino 8/1
Steven Gerrard 8/1
Craig Bellamy 9/1
Peter Crouch 9/1
Ricardo Oliveira 9/1
Clarence Seedorf 14/1
Robbie Fowler 12/1
Harry Kewell 16/1
Yoan Gourcuff 25/1
Andrea Pirlo 16/1
Massimo Ambrosini 25/1
Mark Gonzalez 25/1
John Arne Riise 20/1
Xabi Alonso 25/1

How will the 1st goal be scored?

Right foot 4/7
Left foot 4/1
Header 11/2
No goal 11/2

And here are my predictions, and bugger the odds. Liverpool will win. Kuyt will score the first goal with his right foot.

What is it that pollsters do, please?

Yogendra Yadav, quoted in ibnlive.com, explaining why the pollsters went horribly wrong in the UP elections.

"There are three reasons why the polls were so off the mark. First, there was a sampling error, especially in the exit polls. In an exit poll, you don’t choose the person you wish to interview. The voter chooses to walk to or walk away from the investigator stationed outside the polling station. Unless systematic precautions are taken, chances are that any exit poll will over-represent the well-off and upper caste and under-represent the poor and lower caste. This has resulted in systematic under-estimation of the BSP and over-estimation of the BJP over the last decade.

Secondly, there was a response bias. Those who voted for the BSP were less likely to say so to an outsider. Non-dalits who voted for the BSP may have been unwilling to admit it to themselves. This very unusual situation led to an over-reporting for the SP and BJP.

Finally, the vote-seats equation in UP turned out to be very skewed this time. For every one per cent of its votes, the BSP won 6.8 seats, compared to 3.8 for the SP and 3.0 for the BJP. This meant that the BSP won a large number of seats with very small margins. Even if you could foresee the exact vote share of the BSP, it was difficult to forecast the number of its seats."

First, sampling error. Second, response bias. Third, vote-seat equation skew.

And silly me. I thought these were the parameters pollsters took care of.

At least CNN IBN has admitted that they goofed. No one else has, till now.

WWWhere are you, Times Now?

The three home-grown English news channels, NDTV, CNN IBN and Times Now, according to various interpretations of the very same third party TAM data, are virtually neck and neck in the TRP stakes.

Why is it, then, that timesnow.tv is such a laggard when it comes to the Internet offering?

In the graph above, (measured by Alexa) the brown worm is ndtv.com, the green one ibnlive.com and the blue one timesnow.tv.

Considering the fact that The Times of India group owns indiatimes.com, and that Reuters has considerable web experience to call upon, it shouldn't be too difficult to improve the Internet product significantly, should it?

Mumbai Mirror: An object lesson for city-centric news channels

Take a dekko at the front page of Saturday's Mumbai Mirror reproduced above.
I'd take a bet that this is the only English newspaper in India that has no mention of Mayawati and the UP elections on the front page.

That's why Mumbai Mirror has succeeded. It has been positioned as a city paper, and, whatever the situation, stays true to the positioning.

That's the challenge for the slew of city-centric news television channels that are due to launch. For them to have the conviction and steadfastness to prioritise for a city audience as opposed to a national audience.

News Channels play Clue-Duh

It wasn’t Colonel Mustard with the lead piping in the conservatory that did in the news channels, it was Mayawati with the Dalit-Brahmin vote bank in Uttar Pradesh.
All the Hindi and English news channels (yes, all) got the results of the just completed UP elections horribly wrong, despite most of them claiming error margins of just a few percentage points during their final exit poll programming before the official numbers started coming in.
They all predicted a dead heat, when Mayawati romped home by a few lengths, making the BJP and the SP look like also rans when the channels tipped them to be joint favourites.
What went wrong with the fortune gazing? To go back to Cluedo, perhaps they were asking the wrong questions of the wrong people in the wrong rooms.
If the news channels were tipsters, the viewers were the punters – and now the viewers look like mugs.
And that’s something the channels need to worry about. Because it’ll be a snowy day in Mumbai before I take the shirt off my back to back a winner predicted by ANY of the Hindi and English news channel.

Of KBC, cricket, STAR TV and Newscorp

For those who haven’t had the time to read the NewsCorp Earnings for Q3, here are two comments (italicised) pertinent to India:

“STAR’s third quarter operating income decreased from the same period a year ago as 11% revenue growth, primarily from higher advertising revenues, was more than offset by higher programming costs. The increased advertising revenue reflects the broadcast on STAR PLUS of Kaun Banega Crorepati 3, India’s version of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire.”

With KBC 3, the YoY the revenue growth is only 11%? No wonder the income decreases, as, surely, the cost of KBC 3 would have been significantly higher than the average programming costs on STAR Plus. The numbers beg the question – are the big ticket efforts like KBC worth the risk given the explosion of channels and the choices available to viewers?

“Operating results from the Other segment during the third quarter declined by $55 million primarily due to losses associated with the 2007 Cricket World Cup. These losses, which related to the final event under the Company’s programming contract with the International Cricket Council, were due to substantial advertising weakness as viewership declined with the early elimination of popular teams India and Pakistan.”


The poor performance of India (one wonders how much impact the elimination of Pakistan had on TV revenues – I doubt it could be as significant as the Newscorp comment) has affected not only Indian broadcasters but Newscorp as well – and perhaps it’s time to ponder more on the safety of putting money on cricket. Sports such as football, tennis, golf, F1, basketball and so on, are not impacted as significantly if a favourite is knocked out early in a tournament. The audiences (and, subsequently, the advertisers) are not overloaded in a single demographic as is the case with cricket. It will not be enough for the sport if the Indian team starts doing well again – cricket needs audiences in the rest of the cricket playing nations – especially audiences that will excite major advertisers and sponsors from Australia and England.